Accidental Mooning

The other day I saw a post on Facebook about the traffic on 19th Street.  The south side of town has exploded with businesses and houses.  19th Street used to be kind of in the country.  It was on the far southern fringe of  town.  Today it is the fast food hub of the world.  Within about a mile strip of road, there are approximately 10 of each kind of fast food imaginable: chicken, hamburgers, tacos, subs, pizza.

It is impossible to drive down this street without getting stuck in an intersection. That is the Facebook post — people blocking the intersection.  Its not so much that people try to beat the yellow light (although that happens and I don’t blame them because I have sat through 3 green lights before we actually move again), its that the traffic lights themselves are a problem for the amount of cars filled with people needing their fast food fix.

Image result for traffic jam stuck in intersection cartoon

I drive into intersections with a green light.  I can see green lights ahead of me.  Traffic is moving.  All systems are go.  Then for no apparent reason, we stop.  My light turns yellow, then red.  I’m stuck.   People start honking.  They’re making ugly gestures and I can see their mouths moving in what I’m assuming is not constructive criticism.  Yet, there I sit with my ass hanging out in the intersection.  I need a drink.

This is not the only time I have had my butt hanging out.  Literally.  I was at a park  stretching after a run.  I was the only car in the parking lot and was on the other side doing my stretches.   A guy pulled up and parked right in front of me.  He had the whole place to park.  So I showed him my rear end as I finished stretching.  I hope the horror he suffered taught him some manners.  Running shorts offer a brief mooning while bending over.

Image result for short running shorts cartoon

I love golf but golf courses were made for men.  Sometimes I drink while golfing.  There is usually one bathroom on the course.  Not a problem for the guys.  They just utilize the nearest tree.  Not so easy for a girl.  However, a few times after several beers, I find the nearest bush and hope for the best.  I wonder how many golfers I have mooned.

Sometimes on trail runs, I have to find a bush.  How many innocent fishermen and hikers have I flashed?


Fun fact about the moon:  The moon doesn’t have a dark side.  It’s rotation is synced with the earth so we always see the same side.  The other side is also lit, but can only be seen from space.  Astronauts have seen it.

I guess we never know who is looking at our moon.

Image result for mooning cartoon images

Is mooning still a thing?  It should be.


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